Sermon

Today I leave Belfast. It is an incredibly bittersweet feeling. On one hand, I am SO excited to see my family and friends back home, but on the other... Belfast feels like home to me now.

In honor of my final day in Belfast, I will let you viewers at home read the "sermon" I gave on my final week at Fortwilliam and Macrory (further proof that the way I write and the way I speak is not actually too dissimilar):

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A few weeks ago, Lesley asked me if I would be willing to give the message this morning. No pressure, I was free to speak for as much or little of the service as I'd like. Not one to back down from things that scare me, I agreed and began immediately... to procrastinate.

So this week began, and I still had no idea what I would say to you, the people who have become my family away from home for a year. Most of what I'd be inclined to say to you was already covered in my newsletter piece (I shouldn't have given it all up in one go!), so I was back at square one.

...So I did what I imagine most people do when they have to give the message on Sunday - I began with the lectionary. For those who aren't aware, there is a list of Bible passages each day - you can find the list anywhere online - that are used as a sort of guideline for churches around the world. So I settled in with my YAV worship CD in the background and began to read: first up, Psalms 103 and 150. As the "Morning Psalms", these are typically very praise-the-Lordy. So I made a mental note and moved on to the "First Reading" - 1 Samuel. Picking up just after David beat Goliath. I imagine that I could have made this into something interesting, but probably not appropriate for a fond farewell... on to "Second Reading" - Romans 10:4-17. Sent by the Lord to share his love with others. Check. As you can tell (since we just read this one), I liked this one best of my options thus far and set it aside for the service. Now to find a second reading. The Gospel reading was all about shaming those Pharisees, and the Evening Psalm was another praise-the-Lord standard. I thought that was it and got ready to scroll back up through the Psalms to pick my favorite. At that moment, two things happened that seemed like a pretty clear message - the song changed, and my finger slipped.

So what does this mean? Well, my finger slipped onto the down arrow - and I realized that there was one more option available to me in this long lectionary list... and the song changed to a worship hymn we sing often at YAV events. Both were Psalm 139.

Sometimes, things just fall into place. In those rare moments of perfect timing, I know that God's hand is at work. Moving to Louisville after college was just a little too easy. Choosing the YAV program was easy when everything fell into place. This Psalm, especially verses 7-10, have been particularly important to me this year. I'll read it for you in the version I've learned by heart:

Where can I go from your Spirit?
Where can I flee from your presence? If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me,
your right hand will hold me fast.

I was first introduced to this passage at our placement event - the weekend that changed my life by confirming that I would be spending this year with you here in Belfast. The 3,746 miles between my house and Skegoneill Drive (as the crow flies) felt insurmountable. The "far side of the sea" in this case felt particularly far away. But the song served as a reminder that I wouldn't be alone. God's hand would guide me, even in Belfast.

After some time here, I realized something about myself - as much as I hated to admit it, part of my decision to join this program was selfish - I had a lot of baggage that I thought I could leave behind in Louisville, and getting away for a year felt like a good way to forget some of that. Singing this song on a retreat with other YAVs reminded me that there is no where I could flee from God's presence.

Each time I come across this passage or this song, it holds a different meaning for me. Following the passage along farther, we praise God for making us just as we are: fearfully and wonderfully. We implore God to search us, to know us and learn our secrets. Dark is made light in his presence. We are reminded that there is no escape from God. We may try and run, or hide the bits we're ashamed of, but He is here. He loves us still, and encourages us to be better.

... So I heard this call and moved to Belfast. Does this mean that's the only way that you can fill God's call? Packing up your life and moving somewhere drastic? Of course not. Romans 10:8 reminds us that "the message is as near as your mouth or your heart." We carry God's love with us, and it is our charge to share that message with those who haven't heard it, or may have forgotten. You can show this love in simple ways - calling in to check on a friend who is having a hard time. Suspending judgement on someone before you get to know their lives and their circumstances. You don't have to travel half a world away to do it.

In fact, many of you have done this with me this year. I'm so grateful for those with whom I've had the opportunity to share a meal or conversation. I may be biased, but I feel that taking the time to get to know "the YAV" as a person rather than just a function makes the year that much richer for both parties!

You have so many exciting things coming up in this coming year - I've had the opportunity to spend time with Becki, and I'm insanely jealous that Sarah will get to spend more time with her. The outreach projects of this congregation are beginning to gather momentum, and you have the possibility to really impact people's lives. I'm so glad to have had the opportunity to walk along with you, if only for this short time. It is going to be really difficult to leave you all!

I close now with another YAV standard-issue prayer that has meant a lot throughout this year, and even more so as I leave this place with no idea of where my next steps will take me:

MY LORD GOD, I have no idea where I am going. I do not see the road ahead of me. I cannot know for certain where it will end. Nor do I really know myself, and the fact that I think I am following your will does not mean that I am actually doing so.

But I believe that the desire to please you does in fact please you. And I hope I have that desire in all that I am doing. I hope that I will never do anything apart from that desire. And I know that if I do this you will lead me by the right road, though I may know nothing about it.

Therefore I will trust you always though I may seem to be lost and in the shadow of death. I will not fear, for you are ever with me, and you will never leave me to face my perils alone.

Amen.

A difficult goodbye

I've mentioned before that part of my responsibilities at Fortwilliam and Macrory include the monthly FortMac newsletter. Last month, my final issue, it was my turn to write the opinion piece. I used that opportunity to write a letter of thanks to the congregation, which I share with you now below (edited slightly to remove last names).

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I don’t know how many times I've sat down to write this piece. A dozen? But each time I find that I can’t quite find the words to say. What wisdom can I impart that I haven’t first learned from each of you? 

It’s a little strange, saying goodbye a month before I actually go—but I suppose I’ll welcome this opportunity, so that you can have the next few weeks to tell me I’m full of it for what I’m about to say. I've learned so much here. I came to Belfast to be challenged, to experience something different from my life in Louisville, and then was surprised when it happened—there were times that I was definitely challenged!

I suppose the first thing I learned was to relax. As many of you may have discovered over this year, I have a tendency to obsess over details… but guess what? I’m not perfect! This year your kindness has given me the room to try new things, and the grace to brush myself off when I inevitably fall on my face.

Silly boys at BB

Another thing I learned was to listen. I've come to Belfast to learn about Northern Ireland, about the lives that you lead and the things that affect your reality. In many ways, the struggles are the same here as at home, but being in a different environment has allowed me to see things with a different perspective.

Will I ever understand everything that it means to be from Belfast? Of course not. But I've had a great opportunity this year to listen to your experiences, and I thank all those who have invited me in to their lives: particularly to Ann and Roy for introducing me to the North Coast; Sylvia and Roy, Pat / Michele / Siobhan's clan, Daphne and Billy for sharing meals with me; the Young Adult Group for some good craic each month; Stewart, Norma and Pamela for looking out for me at the Boys’ Brigade (and for numerous lifts to Macrory Halls!); the staff team and volunteers that welcomed me as one of their own; and my faithful Bible study group that has been particularly special during my year here: Ann, Heather, Helene, Muriel and Veronica.

Part of the family for Christmas

I have learned something from each and every one of you… and even if your name was not mentioned, please know that I have truly appreciated being a part of your congregational life this year.

I leave Belfast in a few short weeks (has it really gone so quickly?!?) and with me I take a fondness for Tunnocks Tea Cakes, a vastly expanded vocabulary, and numerous photographs and reminders of my time here. More importantly, however, I take a personal strength I never knew before.

Our last week of Bible study

Coming here, away from family and friends, has been difficult, but it has also given me the self-confidence to stand up for myself and to know that I’m capable of mastering whatever life throws my way. I still don’t know where the next stage will take me, but I go forward from this place, secure in the fact that I will have this community keeping me in their hearts and prayers from the other side of the ocean.

I leave you for now with the words of a prayer that is shared with each YAV as they prepare for their year of service. I find that it is still as applicable for me today as it was over a year ago, when I learned I would be spending this time with you. You might consider cutting it out with the picture and bio of Sarah to keep her in your prayers as she prepares for her time in Northern Ireland!

With all my love,

Tricia

MY LORD GOD, 

I have no idea where I am going. 

I do not see the road ahead of me. 

I cannot know for certain where it will end. 

Nor do I really know myself,

and the fact that I think I am following your will

does not mean that I am actually doing so. 

But I believe that the desire to please you does in fact please you.

And I hope I have that desire in all that I am doing. 

I hope that I will never do anything apart from that desire.

And I know that if I do this you will lead me by the right road, 

though I may know nothing about it. 

Therefore I will trust you always

though I may seem to be lost and in the shadow of death.

I will not fear, for you are ever with me,

and you will never leave me to face my perils alone. 

Thomas Merton, “Thoughts in Solitude” 

© Abbey of Gethsemani 

One Week

Next Sunday is my last in Belfast.

(so strange to type that!)

This week and the next have been / will be full of packing, spending time with friends and trying to visit all the places I've put off til the end. Oh, yeah - and the 12th of July is in there somewhere. That's a whole other post...

FMPCI team at dinner

Even though my room is slowly emptying, it still hasn't sunk in that my time here is coming to an end. I'm not sure when it will feel real - my final service at Fortwilliam and Macrory? Saying goodbye to my fellow YAVs before I head on holiday? Getting on the plane to America? Three months from now in the middle of the night?

Making progress...

So I guess in addition to general "what's happening-ness", part of this post is a sort of apology... if I've had to say goodbye to you already and it didn't quite have the weight of "I might never see you again" attached - it's because it isn't quite real to me yet. I will definitely miss everyone here!

Vine - volunteer appreciation lunch

What I'm Listening To: Father's Day Edition

Daddy's Girl

Father / daughter songs. There are a lot of them - and some do it better than others (I'm looking at you, Frank and Nancy - that's weird). Today's song is very special to me, as I listen to it (usually on repeat) whenever I'm missing my daddy. I thought it would be appropriate for a special Father's Day edition of "What I'm Listening To"... so this one goes out to mine.

Although this version might be more appropriate for my dad... Dougie. (See 3:54 - that's totally my Dougie-Fresh dad)

Derby Daddy-O

(Lyrics below)

Welcome to Thirty.

It's official. I've been "in my thirties" for a week now, and I'd like to take the opportunity to thank all of you who made it so special!

Although my birthday was on Thursday, I felt very lucky to be celebrated all week by the people I've held nearest and dearest in my time here. Kicking off the week on Monday with a red velvet cake Veronica baked for our Bible Study was certainly a great start! Everyone was so kind and generous.

I got to spend the actual day at the Vine - lunch club with the pensioners and homework club with the wee ones - an hilarious balance of those who consider 30 to be very young with those who consider 30 to be very old!

After work, my friend David and I rushed to the bus station for our 5.5-hour trip to Cork. We spent the next two days exploring the city and incredible grounds at Blarney Castle - yes, I kissed the stone!

We made it back to Belfast for work on Sunday, but my special birthday treats were not yet over! Last year, when my friend Bill learned I would be spending the year in the British Isles, he told me about Scottish singer Julie Fowlis - who some might recognize from the soundtrack for the Disney movie Brave. So when I heard that she would be performing in Belfast, I was sold! What a great show - it was held in a tent with little twinkle lights dancing in the breeze, and the whole thing was just a bit magical. Here's the end of their set: 

and the song from the movie (the only song that wasn't sung in Scottish Gaelic):

While my life has now more or less returned to business as usual after 2 weeks mentally dedicated to Derby and birthday, in the end even though hitting 30 was a scary milestone... it's not so bad on the other side! 

A glimpse of heaven...

This week in JAFFA*, we asked the kids to draw us what they thought Heaven looked like. The results were predictably adorable, so I brought them home and compiled them all into one picture. My favorite might be the dog in the top right corner... because as we all know, All Dogs Go To Heaven!

*JAFFA = Jesus A Friend For All, a weekly club for children at the Vine Centre

Anyone can love the loveable

Happy Valentine's Day!

I hope you are all feeling happy and sufficiently loved today. If no one has told you they love you yet - just let me know and I'll send you a Valentine ;-)

In the spirit of this day of love, I thought I'd share a bit from my personal study. I came across Matthew 5:43-44 recently:

43 “You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor. (Leviticus 19:18) Hate your enemy.’ 44 But here is what I tell you. Love your enemies. Pray for those who hurt you. ..."

Many people who read this passage feel a bit of a kick in the gut whenever they hear this. Loving mean people is HARD! I think it's important to remember these words, but also to remember that it's not difficult to love those who are kind, or those who fit easily into our categories of "acceptable" behaviour and appearance... but sometimes, it's those who don't seem "loveable" that need it the most.

Reading this certainly made me take a second look at the people I see on a daily basis, and evaluate my actions toward them. I hope you'll do the same.

Love you!

6 Months

It hit me today that 6 months from today, I'll be boarding a plane back to the states. It is so strange to think that I'm already halfway through my year in Belfast.

Looking back, I'm sure there are a lot of ways I've changed and adapted to being here. I've learned so much about myself. I've proven that I'm stronger than I think, that I can move to a foreign country, that I can navigate a new city. I've formed friendships both within the YAV program, and in the places I work.

(Most of) the Saturday night Youth Club team

I get to work with kids who are rowdy and hyper and "do my head in" (that's Belfast for "drive me crazy") on a regular basis, but who are also hilarious and smart and fill me with so much joy. Today, C. didn't see me in homework club and asked where I was (I was right behind her); M. asked how much longer until I had to go home (prompting my aforementioned realization). Her granny says she caught her practicing her American accent at home: "I'm Tricia, and I'm from America!"

Working on "maths" in Homework Club

I know I don't always focus on my day-to-day activities on this blog - mostly because it sounds boring when I list it out: helping with homework, teaching kids to make pretzels, reading stories to the Boys' Brigade or serving lunch to pensioners. But what I'm really doing is forming relationships. Letting these people into my heart... which will make that moment when I board a plane 6 months from now so much more difficult.

Story time in Boys' Brigade

All I can do now is make the most of the time I have left!

A challenge from Kid President

I imagine at this point, most of you have seen the Pep Talk from Kid President that's been circulating around the Internet... if not, go ahead, I'll wait here.

Anyway, Kid President has challenged the world (yep, he's an ambitious 8-year old) to make 2013 Awesome... for someone else. A noble goal indeed. Don't know where to start? Don't worry, KP's gotcha covered:

 (and FYI, I'm allergic to cats)

Happy Holidays!

Happy New Year, everyone!

Well, I survived the holidays away from home thanks to a festive roomie, adopted family and lots of Skype.

Opening gifts via Skype

Anna and I decorated the tree together (shown in the last post), then I left her to her own creativity to decorate the rest of the house. As promised, a taste of the holidays in our home: 

  

Handmade decorations and lots of cards from friends!

The YAV bunch celebrated Christmas together with a sleepover in East Belfast. As always, it was nice to have the opportunity to all get together for some fun. 

...because we are so normal.

I actually did something this holiday season I haven't done in over a decade: sing in front of other people. It was fun to learn the traditional songs that are so different from what we would learn at home as I sang at both the Carol services at the Vine and Fortwilliam and Macrory. 

On Christmas Eve, we went to the midnight service led by the youth at Anna's church. It was fun to meet the people she's talked so much about, and to see all the progress they made on the play they wrote themselves. I came home and skyped with the whole McClan for the traditional Christmas Eve dinner at Grandmother's house... what was 1 am for me was just after dinner for them so I got to participate in (/ take) the annual family photo from 3750 miles away! 

Anna and I woke up and did Christmas together before heading to our respective churches for the Christmas morning services. I skyped with my mom as she prepared for her Christmas feast (it was still too early back home for anyone else to be awake), and then made my way over to the home of the family that hosted me for dinner. 

 

They made me feel right at home as we hung out, exchanged gifts and ate WAY too much food together just like I would have been doing at home. It made being away from my family a whole lot easier.

My friend Steph and I rang in the new year in Paris, standing in the rain at the Arc de Triomphe as the Eiffel Tower sparkled behind us!

    

   

Now I'm resting up, working on getting over the cold that inevitably follows a NYE spent standing in the rain... and getting ready for whatever 2013 sends my way!

Lots of love,
T.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Participating in family holidays via Skype!

I had such a busy week, I've had to extend the holiday a bit longer to accommodate this post. I hope none of you will mind!

As I've mentioned in the past, Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday. I always think it's important to take the time to be mindful of the many blessings in my life, and Thursday was no exception. In fact, I made a list before I even got out of bed. A few highlights:

Thankfulness list 2012

My family - always at the top of my list, because I love my family. Like an insane amount. Some might say this is because I live 4000+ miles away, but whatever. They have been so supportive of me on this journey, and I appreciate everything they've done - both to make it possible, and to shape me into the kind of person who would want to help people for a living. I've also learned that whether you're born, married or adopted (literally or figuratively), family is what (and who) you make it.

My other famil(ies) - my Second Pres family who show me such love and believe in me so much. My friends who rock my face off and I miss every day, my fellow YAVs both here and around the world who make me laugh when I'm having a hard day and get what it means to be spending Thanksgiving away from home. I wouldn't be here doing this work without your encouragement and support.

The opportunities I've been given to do God's work and explore His community - I love my job. My time as a YAV, and at the PC(USA) before that, has been really fulfilling. I'm not going to lie, I have days that are really challenging. But the people I've met along the way have made it worth it. The opportunities I get on a daily basis to make someone feel special or cared for - and having someone take a day out of their life to drive me up the coast, make a special Thanksgiving card because they know I'll miss my family, or even just remember my name make me feel accepted and appreciated. Even when they're mocking my accent.

Thanksgiving Tree at the Vine

For warm clothes, good food and clean water - I know I am really lucky. I have everything I need to live a happy, healthy life. I'm thankful for this.

For hot water - I have no idea why my just-awoken brain put this on the list, but I'll roll with it. Perhaps I was anticipating a shower, or appreciating my radiator and the hot-water bottle I sleep with. Maybe I just wanted a cuppa. I'm glad for it all the same.

For the beauty of God's earth - seriously, have you seen any of the photos I've posted in the last 3 months? This place is crazy-beautiful. It's not hard to be mindful of God's creation when you're surrounded by it!

There's more on my list, but I'll leave it at this. What are you thankful for this year?

My obsession

Tunnock's tea cakes are delicious.
That is all. 

Sorry to those for whom those
delicious cakes were intended.
They are in my belly.

Transitioning

Ah, where to begin...

My last week in Louisville was full of happy goodbyes, family and frantic packing. My brother came in for the weekend, and I was so glad to have the opportunity to celebrate his birthday with him on Saturday. Sunday was my commissioning at Second Pres (with the gift of a lovely prayer shawl from the Busy Needles knitting group) and a goodbye party hosted by my dad and step mom in their home.

Annual "August Birthdays" dinner

Kind words from friends

While my intention was that I would be packed and ready to go in time to get a good night's rest on my last night in my own bed... of course that didn't happen. My second carefully-packed bag ended up being overweight, so I spent hours unpacking, repacking and weeding out unnecessary items to reach my goal of 50 lbs. per bag. As a result of that and other random last-minute preparations, I got about 1.25 hours of sleep before we had to leave for the airport soon after 5 a.m.!

My travel buddy Will was a lifesaver...
And incredibly tolerant of sleepy Tricia, hyper Tricia
and bomb-scare-in-Newark -airport-causing Tricia
(I'll save that story for another time)

The aforementioned "Sleepy Tricia",
in my Busy Needles prayer shawl
(post-nap in the Chicago airport)

We arrived at the conference center in Stony Point, NY that afternoon, and have been "orienting" ourselves ever since. It's been so nice to be in the company of the friends I made back in March, as well as meeting MY FUTURE FLATMATE and those matched with National sites (and therefore not involved in the International placement event).

I know some of you are confused as to why I'm in New York right now instead of Belfast. This week is meant to be a transition from our homes and familiar cultures into our lives in new cities and countries. We will spend time in fellowship, learning about the challenges we will face in these new communities, and preparing ourselves for the journey. 

Everyone I've spoken to in the past few weeks has had some version of the same questions for me: "Are you excited?" / "how are you feeling?" My honest answer was usually some version of "yes I'm excited, but mostly exhausted" / "I'll tell you in a few weeks once I've been able to process everything." It doesn't matter how much you try to prepare yourself, there are always unexpected challenges when you move - especially when that move is split between a storage unit and a foreign country you've never visited. The past few weeks have been exhausting emotionally as well as physically, and I still don't think I've fully recovered! Of course, all-day seminars on serious topics like sexual harassment and cultural sensitivity, combined with the desire to stay up late socializing don't help much, either! 

I'm sure I'll be able to express my experience more eloquently at some point in the future, but I know a lot of you have been texting, calling or facebooking to check in with my time here ...and I've been relatively unresponsive. It's nothing personal, but I'm just trying to take things moment by moment in an attempt to be present in the emotions and with people that are going through this journey with me.

Love you, mean it!

xox

You rock!

I received my fundraising update this afternoon to the happy news that I have now exceeded my fundraising goal for my year of service as a Young Adult Volunteer! I feel like a broken record when I keep saying this, but I am truly grateful for your support and love as I prepare for this journey. I wish I could bake you all cookies in thanks, because that's how it makes me feel when I see your name on my spreadsheet: warm and gooey.

If you still haven't gotten around to making a donation, but wanted to support my service, never fear - all donations made here will still be credited to my account. In other news, I will be arriving in Belfast in approximately 53 days and 13 hours with these people: 

A screen shot from our message board - the 8 NI YAVs for 2012-13.
Courtney, Kathryn, Beth, T.J., David, Anna, Grace, me :)

Get ready, Belfast.

Discernment and Commissioning

dis-cern [dih-surn, -zurn]

verb (used with object)

1. to perceive by the sight or some other sense or by the intellect; see, recognize or apprehend: They discerned a sail on the horizon.
2. to distinguish mentally; recognize as distinct or different; discriminate: He is incapable of discerning right from wrong.

We spend a lot of time talking about discernment in the Young Adult Volunteer program. Discerning whether to spend a year in the program, whether to stay at home or abroad, which vocation will follow your YAV year... it's a word I have become a lot more familiar with since our placement weekend in March.

I was joking with a few members of my congregation that I've been successfully avoiding seminary since graduating with a religion minor 7 years ago. Since admitting this, I've been actively challenged in this avowal - multiple times - from several different places. I was discussing this with my friend, the recently Reverend Alex, and he pointed out that I'm not the only one who has felt like running in the opposite direction of a perceived call. What's up, Jonah?

com-mis-sion [kuh-mish-uhn]

verb (used with object)

1. to give a commission to: to commission a graduate of a military academy.
2. to authorize; send on a mission.
3. to give the order that places a warship, military command, etc., in a state of complete readiness for active duty.
4. to give a commission or order for: The owners commissioned a painting for the building's lobby.

Last night, Will (future Kenya YAV) and I were recognized at a special meeting of the Mid-Kentucky Presbytery. We were reminded that our commissioning was both a privilege and a responsibility to uphold with God's help. Among the vows that we pledged were a commitment to accepting the persons we serve where they are and just the way they are, to work in glad cooperation and mutual support with other workers, to demonstrate our love of Christ and commitment to our call.

As my time here is wrapping  up, the importance of this decision is becoming clear. Feeling literally carried in love as I begin this journey reminds me so much of my ordination as a ruling elder 3 years ago. I can still feel the waves of warmth and love from those in the congregation who laid hands on our class and prayed for our service. Since that day, I still can't hear the hymn, "Here I am Lord" without choking back a tear. I particularly like the revised version we sing at Second - rather than going if God leads us, we should be open to going where.

Here I am Lord, is it I Lord?
I have heard you calling in the night
I will go Lord, where you lead me
I will hold your people in my heart.

Daniel L. Schutte (revision in italic)

What I do when I'm not doing what I do...

A break from the YAV-ness to give props to my BFF for a moment. I've been involved with Team Sweaty Sheep for about a year now, and have met the most awesome people in the process. So when I'm not filling out visa paperwork or shopping for rain boots, I'm apparently jumping up and down like a fool by the side of the road. In case you weren't already aware, check out the video below for proof that I am a goofball:



For those of you lucky ducks who get to go to GA next week - don't forget to say hi to my Sweaty Sheep teammates, who will be riding their bikes up from Louisville!

Two months!

Two months from today, I will be boarding a plane for Stony Point. Yesterday, I turned in the last of my preparatory paperwork, so now I am free to focus on purging my storage unit, packing, and finishing up the rest of my fundraising requirements.

I am blown away by your support of my upcoming journey. Thanks to your support, I have raised over $7500 so far! (If you have sent a donation but don't see your name on the ticker - never fear! Sometimes it takes awhile for the donation to be filed, and for me to receive notification.)

As I've mentioned in the past, my $8000 goal is only a fraction of what it costs the denomination to cover my programmatic expenses... as well as travel, visas, stipends, health insurance, housing and food allowance for the coming year. Anything collected above the minimum is still credited toward my trip - I would love to exceed this goal!

I appreciate the kind words and notes that have been arriving at my door (/ inbox) in a steady stream since March. Your encouragement means so much to me. If you feel moved to support my year, I've included a few options below:

1. Pray for me!
2. Spread the word
• Tell people about the Young Adult Volunteer program, my work at Fortwilliam and Macrory Presbyterian Church and the Vine Community and Advice Centre.
3. Keep in touch
• I already have my address and phone numbers for while I'm away, but rather than post them on the internet, please email tricia.mcreynolds [at] gmail.com to request it!
• Add my blog to your RSS feed or via one of the links in the side bar.
4. Pledge financial support
• Give a tax-deductible contribution as a one-time gift or in installments over the course of my year of service.
• Give online at http://gamc.pcusa.org/give/E210105/ or
• Send a check made payable to the PC(USA) at P.O. Box 643700; Pittsburgh, PA  15264-3700. Include on the memo line of the check my name and the number E210105.

Saying goodbye...

So I touched on it briefly in my last post - the difficulty of saying goodbye.

(I write this post in the interest of transparency I've promised to this blog and my experiences with the YAV program - but I'm going to save it until I get back to Kentucky. Mostly because I don't know that I can hold it together if my mom reads this before I go. Mom, you've been warned.)

On each trip to Orlando, I typically try to find time to visit some places that hold special significance: a walk through part of the neighborhood I've lived in since preschool, a trip to the park or my old home church. During this particular trip, however, these experiences were especially poignant - as many felt like a final farewell.

So much has changed in my hometown in the 10+ years since I've moved to Kentucky, and the strong memories I hold with these places are beginning to fade (the true testament to this being that I actually got lost driving home by a once-familiar route).

This time, I walked past the house my grandparents lived in for 40+ years and remembered all the little details of growing up there. I looked at the front door, and muscle memory told me exactly what it would feel like to open the latch. Even though my grandparents moved out years ago, seeing a For Sale sign in the yard made me feel like I'd never see the house again.

On Sunday, I visited the church I attended from birth through college... and recognized a total of about 5 people in the 3,950 member congregation. The sermon highlighting their recent switch from PC(USA) to EPC made me feel like even more of an outsider. I quietly said my goodbyes after the service, and honestly don't know that I'll ever go back.
 

Saying goodbye to places is tough, but I've begun to realize how monumentally difficult it will be to say goodbye to my family. Typically stoic, I completely lost it this evening when I dropped my grandma at her apartment after dinner and it hit me that I won't be back home for almost a year and a half.

I know there will be more goodbyes in the months to come. I've even taught my mom to Skype. Part of me hopes that my other goodbyes will go smoothly and tear-free (which is much more my style, actually) - but the other part of me feels blessed to have these relationships that make it so difficult to leave.

"How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard."

-Carol Sobieski, Annie

Slán go fóill

We're raising our glasses to Tricia,
She's leaving and that is our issue,
Have fun in Belfast,
But hurry back fast,

'Cause while you are gone we will miss ya!

- Jake C.

Tonight, my mom and stepdad hosted a fantastic party, full of people I've known throughout my life: old friends and new, cousins, coworkers and significant others... all gathered in my honor for my last visit to Orlando before I leave for Belfast. It was wonderful and humbling to be surrounded in love by these people who have known me my entire life. Of course, as usual, my mother cooked far too much food and a good time was had by all!

The title of this post is slán go fóill - which means in English, "Good bye for now". While it will be difficult to leave my family and friends (3 months to the day from today), I will carry with me the hopes, love and prayers of those who have shaped me over the years and left an indelible mark on my heart in the process. It is truly awesome to have the support of so many as I prepare for this journey. But for now I head to bed, happy and with a new sense of purpose.  I feel that I can't say it enough, but I'll say it again:

THANK YOU!